This is the birth story of our little daughter, Anne. It is a story that I probably wouldn’t believe actually happened if it didn’t happen to me. It is one of those things that sounds too good to be true, like it belongs in an idealistic world, and could in no way be real life. I didn’t know births like this could actually exist and now I am so excited to share this story and hopefully give other women the confidence and hope that their birth can be the same.
My previous experience
Sharing a birth story is a very vulnerable and emotional experience. It is sharing the story of how your body stretched, moved, and possibly broke to bring new life into the world. It can be full of hope and joy, or sorrow and complication. Unfortunately, many women have the latter. Painful birth stories than left them full of shame, guilt, and trauma. That is what I felt after giving birth the first time. Our son was born healthy and strong, I wasn’t injured, but it was so different than the outcome we wanted.
I was born with not one uterus but two. This was discovered when I was 14 and it was then that I was told it could lead to complications getting pregnant or carrying to full term. the chances of this were small, but still higher than the average person. Both my sisters and I were born at home and deep down I also wanted a peaceful homebirth, but my husband and I agreed it would be better to be in or nearer a hospital incase complications were to arise.
Clarks birth
We chose a kind OBGYN for our care and planned to deliver in a birth center that was attached to the hospital. I ended up getting the beginning signs of preeclampsia just days before my due date and had to be induced. From the start of my induction to the time he was born was 25 hours of pain, frustration, and horrible nurses. Even though I had taken a pain free birth course and had learned so much, I wasn’t able to surrender into the contractions the way the teacher had explained to. I was scared and that caused tension, which lead to pain, which increased the fear and so on.
I was told I was at 6cm but felt the urge to push. The nurse told me not to push because I could hurt my baby, so I fought against this natural urge for two hours. He finally descended enough to the point where he was crowning and when I stopped fighting the urge to push, he was born within two minutes. those two hours were the most pain I had ever experienced. Each contraction was miserable and I was holding onto the rails of the bed, white knuckled and exhausted.
I left the hospital with my husband and son feeling happy that we were all safe and ok but feeling like I had failed. It wasn’t what I had wanted, and I didn’t feel as though I had trusted my body to do what it was designed to do. I knew if I ever had the chance to have another baby, things were going to be different because I refused to ever feel this way again.
Preparing for change
I rewatched all the lessons from the class we bought with Clark in preparation to give birth again. I did squats multiple times a week to keep my legs, hips, and pelvic floor strong and open my pelvis. I ate as much protein as I could, focusing on organic whole dairy, clean meats, homemade chicken bone broth, and supplementing with a clean, complete protein powder. Staying hydrated and consuming mineral rich drinks was also so important for me.
There was a lot of prayer over my physical and mental health, a quick and smooth delivery, and safety for the little life I was growing. I mentally prepared for labor by practicing visualizing what my body would do with each contraction and went over relaxation and breathing exercises. Listening to calming music and bible verses helped me to relax and imagine my perfect birth and how I wanted it to turn out.
I was actually excited to give birth because I knew this time would be different, better. I had the sweetest group of midwives, the most peaceful birth center, and had done so much to prepare physically, mentally, and spiritually for this second birth.
Her Birth Story
Due to Alaska law, you cannot birth in a birth center after 42 weeks. I really didn’t want another hospital birth, so I started talking with my midwives about different natural induction options. I believe you go into labor when you are ready. That curb walking, spicy food, or whatever else just so happened to be on the same day you were going into labor anyway. I didn’t want to force labor to happen if my body wasn’t ready, so I didn’t want anything medical unless there was a sign something was wrong.
I was 41 and a half weeks pregnant on the evening of the 15th. It was my husband’s birthday and he said it would be so special to share a birthday with our daughter. I started taking a tincture of blue and black cohosh that the midwives had given me a few days before. It did nothing.
The following day we had an appointment just to be sure all was still ok with the baby and to check that my blood pressure was still in a safe range. A castor oil smoothie was suggested. Normally taking castor oil can jumpstart labor because it irritates the bowel and that can trigger contractions. But this irritation can include nausea, vomiting, and intense diarrhea, which can cause dehydration. None of these are things that a laboring mother wants to be dealing with. However, when combined with the other ingredients of this smoothie it still can trigger labor, but without all the unpleasant symptoms.
Preparing
So, after we left the midwives, we went around finding all the ingredients for this crazy smoothie, tidied up the house, and spent as much time together as possible knowing that this could be our last day before the baby arrived.
I was told to drink it before bed because it takes anywhere from 6-24 hours to start to work. That way I would have at least a few hours of sleep under my belt and best case, would wake up in the morning with a few contractions. Our son Clark was still up so he helped my make the smoothie, so excited that the baby should be born soon. He sat on the counter helping me prepare the drink and expectantly watched me drink it. This was at 9:00pm.
I wanted to put him to bed and enjoy these moments, just me and my son. So, we read some books and we talked about how excited we were that she was going to born and I kept telling him how much I loved him. It took a while for him to settle down and actually fall asleep. He was drifting off at last when I had a contraction. I texted my husband at 9:55 and told him but neither of us had our hopes up because I had been having Braxton Hicks and actual contractions on and off for about two weeks.
The start
I started having what felt like Braxton Hicks contractions that were anywhere from 5-10 minutes apart. Andrew and I sat in the living room and made a list of any last-minute things that weren’t already tucked into our birth bag. Things like the phone cord so we could take videos and play music, snacks from the fridge, and a few freshly filtered bottles of water.
We talked for a few minutes, enjoying the anticipation of our little one being earthside in a day or so. I was still having little contractions, but they still didn’t feel like regular contractions and weren’t painful. Anytime I would feel one coming I would just take a deep breath and relax my face and shoulders to prevent any tension from forming. We got ready and finally crawled into bed at 11:15 and fell right to sleep.
Notifying people
I woke up at 12:45 with the contractions more intense than they were before. They weren’t painful, just stronger. I was told to call the birth center when they were 6 minutes or so apart and too painful to talk through. I was still able to talk so I timed them for about 15 minutes, and they were 2-4 minutes apart. I woke up Andrew to tell him and decided to call the birth center.
Megan, the midwife on call called back in about five minutes. I explained what was going on and that my contractions were close together but not painful. She asked if I had experienced any while on the phone with her since I didn’t pause or deep breathe at all. Once she heard that I had two in the time we were talking she told me to call my friend who was going to watch Clark (and lives almost an hour away) and then rest for a half hour before calling her back.
Increasing intensity
Andrew and I tried going back to sleep but things were just too intense, and I couldn’t get comfortable. Once I started walking around, I had to breathe through them and would lean my forearms on the counter and sway while taking deep breaths. I let Andrew know it was go time and he should start putting things in the car and I would call the midwife again.
At around 2:00am I called Megan and she said she would head to the birth center and that we could head over whenever we were ready. So, I sat on the birth ball in the living room, gentle music playing, surrendering into every surge. Breathing my baby down and staying relaxed so I could avoid tension.
Andrew was almost done getting things in the car, so I called my sister-in-law who was my back up person for Clark because it looked like we were going to leave before my friend would arrive. Contractions were strong, if I did anything other than breath, they were painful. They were more intense, each one pulling me deeper into the birthing world and out of reality. I focused, pictured what my body was doing, and thought about how each surge brought me that much closer to meeting my baby. I hardly remember my sister-in-law walking in, followed by my friend about five minutes later. I smiled at them, welcoming and thanking them between contractions. They sat quietly and just watched while I swayed and gently breathed.
Time to leave
The car was ready, our people were there, it was time to go. I opened my eyes and smiled at my friends, feeling myself return to reality. As I stood up to go, I was hit with the most intense contraction and sat back down. It was almost overwhelming, and I felt an immense sense of urgency that I hadn’t before. When it was over I quickly said goodbye, and kissed my little boy who was still sleeping peacefully. We left the house at 2:40 and I told my husband it wouldn’t be long until we met our baby.
I was hit with another contraction in the car and realized at the same time I needed to use the bathroom. The castor oil had been gently doing its job with no negative effects, but it is still castor oil after all. The eight-minute drive was the longest car ride of my life, and I was hit with another contraction as we pulled into the parking lot. I couldn’t move because this one hurt. I was tense, full of adrenaline, and in a car. So, I vocalized through it, keeping my voice low and tying to relax as much as possible.
As soon as it was over Andrew walked me into the birth center where Megan welcomed us in. I laughed and asked her to turn down the heat or open a window because the room was warm, and it made me antsy. I headed to the bathroom and Andrew turned on the tub to get it filling.
Thinning the veil
I called out that my water broke as I was using the bathroom. There was pressure and as I walked back into the room I didn’t want to stand or sit. I don’t remember climbing onto the foot of the bed and getting on all fours. My natural instincts were taking over as I was hit with another huge wave. The veil was thin, reality a blur as I let my body take over and surrendered.
I called out “I am having a baby”. I remember Megan walking over and rubbing my shoulder “yes Samantha, you are. You are doing a great job”. She didn’t understand, the time was now. I sank deeper into the instincts that were taking over my mind as I repeated myself, not having the words to explain. Reaching down I felt the top of my little one’s head. She gasped and said “yes, yes you are”, and with that my brain was gone.
Full surrender
I don’t remember Andrew walking over to rub my head and encourage me. I don’t remember Megan talking me through it and having her hands there to catch the baby or stepping back to take pictures. Everything else just faded away, the worship music we had playing, the lights, the two people supporting me. In that moment it was just me, my baby, and the Holy Spirit.
I took a breath and pushed. The head was out, the top still cradled in my palm. A few more calming breaths, the surge increased. One deep breath and another push. I reached down with the other hand and caught her and sat back against the pillows to welcome her into the world.
She was born at 2:52, less than five minutes after arriving at the birth center. Andrew curled up with us in bed, savoring those blissful moments.
Our little Anne Summer was finally here.
And so…
I can honestly say that I enjoyed delivering our daughter. After a birth that was almost completely pain free, I have such a desire to share the wonderful, empowering experience that birth can be. If you have had a traumatic birth, know first that you are not alone. But also, that there is so much more to birth that pain and fear. It can be a truly beautiful thing.
Feel free to share your positive birth stories in the comments to inspire others.
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